Thursday, November 30, 2006

As For Rehoboth Beach, Though, Is It Possible To Be Up-And-Coming and Aging-And-Sun-Damaged At The Same Time?

The website www.gayghettos.com (who knew?) has come up with a list of up-and-coming new, well, gay ghettos. Obviously the founders of the site are cleverly just trying to corner the luxury online real estate ad market. After all, who wouldn´t want to target a wealthy minority as they peruse the web looking for places to overspend on up-and-coming neighborhoods? But who knows, it might be accurate.

The list is interesting for a few reasons, not the least of which because it includes Andersonville, the Chicago neighborhood where official Straight Fagat Brother, Bald Knob, lives with his girlfriend. (And, oddly, the South End in Boston, the former home of our mom´s ex boyfriend. Like we ever had a chance.)

But we must object to the inclusion of Hell´s Kitchen. Sure, some bargain-hunting gays live there, and yes, Therapy is nearby. But if HK is the future of gay life in the city, we may just move to South Second, WI. We´re no experts, but this is a neighborhood best known for its cramped sublets with fake walls, framed posters, second-hand futons, fake plants, and mismatching Ikea furniture. From what we can tell, the gays that live there are a bunch of double-denim-wearing, TKTS-stub-clutching, DEP-gel-using, Instinct-subscribing, chin-pube-sporting, RENT-soundtrack-(still)-singing, triple-finger-snapping members of Dolphin Fitness. Who couldn´t even get their shit together to live in the East Village.

If this is what´s up-and-coming in New York, we might as well be up and going.

7 comments:

LL said...

Fishwatch is spending all his time this summer hanging out there, so be careful...

Anonymous said...

If by "shit together" you mean "trust fund." I kid! Not really.

But you still won't find me sipping cardamom vodka at Vlada.

Gunn said...

It is a testament to your writing that I come here so frequently because at times like these I wonder why the fuck this sort of thing matters.
Carry on. Carry on.

cb said...

Fagat, I believe there's a certain house in Rehoboth that's both up-and-coming and sun-damaged.

Bald Knob said...

A'ville is indeed a gay neighborhood, mostly older gays and lesbians, although with Hamburger Mary's and Madrigals (strip club) starting to draw the younger crowd. We live there for the great shops....

Brenda from across the street said...

So HK is not a future gay ghetto, not because it doesn't have gays, but because it doesn't have the right kind of gays (aka you)?

P.S. Feel free to "up and go."

bigmouth said...

Oh Brenda. We kid because we love!

Slash, because sometimes we have nothing else to write about.