Tuesday, April 18, 2006

And He Bought A One Way Ticket Back To The Life He Once Knew

Have we told you about one of our favorite weekly web visits yet? Models.com picks a new tweenage catalogue star every week and featured him or her. Our favorites are normally the ESL 16 year-olds from Eastern Europe, who say things like “My favorite thing about America is Whitney Houston. And astronaut ice cream!” But this week we take exception for American born-and-raised, cornfed whiteboy Trevor Davis. Why? Check out his Q & A:

Favorite things: Playing sports, animals and hanging with his best friend.
Favorite food: Pizza
Favorite music/band: Outkast
Hobbies: Sports and working out
If you could bring one thing to NY from home it would be: My best friend Nick

Ah, Trevor. You’ll like having Nick around at first. But then the work days at Rent-A-Waiter will get longer, nights will get later, and pretty soon you’ll be stumbling home from Fabian Basabe’s house at 6 am with a new coke habit, $1,500 in your wallet and eurotrash manstink in your every crevice.

And then good old Nick, who seemed like all you ever wanted when the two of you would play Frogger at Ol’ Uncle Winkie’s Pizza Parlor in Yardley, Pennsylvania, is going to be waiting for you at home, angry, overweight, and unfabulous. And then the fighting will begin, and the rending of ironic t-shirts, and the gnashing of veneers.

Welcome to the big city, kid.


Frank said...

I initially read "hanging with his best friend" as "banging his best friend." That's even before I got to the rest of the post! I must be psychic.

Anonymous said...

It's funny cause it's true