There Was Definitely An Episode Of Queer As Folk About Exactly This

A gay rights group has filed a lawsuit against Massachusett’s Attorney General Thomas Reilly for allowing an initiative to reach the polls that could overturn the State Supreme Court’s decision to allow gay marriages. They say his actions were unconstitutional, as a ballot does not have the power to overturn court decisions, according to the state’s constitution. Conservative opponents to gay marriage throughout the state easily obtained the 170,000 signatures needed to get the initiative onto the ballot, mostly through the help of the well organized church networks through the state.

This is all very complicated, and we don’t live in Massachusetts. But what seems clear to us is that these opponents to gay marriage are frighteningly well organized, while we are at best a ragtag crew that gathers together occasionally for cocktails and parades and sunbathing. Nobody carries a pen to these events, much less a ballot initiative petition. (Honestly, we’re lucky if we can even get everyone to wear underwear.)

So we had an idea. What if we started a queer RELIGION? (Unitarian doesn’t count, even though it’s pretting fucking gay.) The Mormons did it less than two hundred years ago! Something that everyone could agree they believed in - that everyone loved and wanted to get involved in. We could take the best elements from other faiths! We could invent heirarchy of holy figures, like the Catholics. Following the Buddhists, we could practice our religion on our own in a quiet place, or in groups if we chose. Like Fundamentalist Christians, we could encourage gays to donate money regularly - and there could even be online worship. That way we could create an huge database of contacts, and reach people quickly and easily!

And hey, for the Jews we could even throw in some institutionalized guilt.

Now if we could think up something like that...