Monday, April 16, 2007

With Friends Like These, Who Needs Marriage?

So a gay marriage bill has been sent on its way to the Connecticut state legislature, despite Governor Jodi Rell's vow that she will veto it (the state already has a civil partnership law). During hearings on the bill, Rep Beth Bye opened up about her own gay lifestyle:
As tears rolled down her cheeks, Bye told members of the committee how her deeply religious father has come to accept and support her gay lifestyle and her partner.

"My father, a devout Catholic, ... has moved on this issue because he loves his daughter.

"He thinks of me as married," said Bye. "The broader world does not see me as married." Her voice shaking, Bye explained how, on her partner’s pension documents, she has been listed as "Other" because she didn’t fit into any of the traditional legal categories.

"I don’t want to be ‘Other,’" insisted Bye, "I want to be married."
This made us think about a couple of gay frenemies of ours who just got engaged. When we heard the news, we were very startled. They both live in New York, where it is not yet legal for gays to get married, or even domestically partnered. At a time when there is a very real battle over whether or not he word "marriage" can mean anything for us, is it appropriate to have wedding ceremonies? Does that not muddy the waters? Shouldn't a young couple wait until they have the legal rights to get married to do so, to show straight people how much we take the word and the institution seriously?

Obviously we recognize the flip side of this. If a couple is loving and committed enough to want to share in the bonds of marriage, why should they bother waiting for bigoted people to give them the O.K.?

Anyway, it doesn't matter in this case. We secretly hate this couple, so we're going to get all of our friends together and buy one another all of the useful gifts on their registry, so when it comes time for the wedding, all that's going to be left for the couple will be window treatments and that antique hobby horse they never thought anyone would actually buy.

What, you didn't see it coming? With gay weddings, it was inevitable: gay wedding sabotage!

2 comments:

LL said...

I always kind of thought that if we just start having ceremonies and calling ourselves "married," the law would have to catch up at some point.

But then again, this is coming from the person who foolishly tried to convince you gay marriage was a bad idea in the first place. Whoops.

MyMyMichl said...

Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Dont stand in the doorway
Dont block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside
And it is ragin.
It'll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls
For the times they are a-changin

- Bob Dylan