Friday, May 19, 2006

We Apologize To The Eight FAGAT Guide Readers Who Do Not Work In Our Office

Our co-worker Patsy informed us that we don’t write about her enough on our blog. So here goes.

A series of haikus, devoted to Patsy:

Thin, smart and pretty
Like a tall drink of water
Except with vodka

Always there to laugh
To cry and to lend support
And sometimes to punch

We like “The Goonies”
“Ducktales” and “Saved By The Bell.”
Not “Say Anything.”

This one time we sang
“Downtown” by Petula Clark.
People were staring.

We learned from Patsy
That revenge is a cold dish
Served best with champagne

A New York legend
And she is just twenty five
We get drunk at work

She likes this fat guy
Who is not nearly worth it
Against our advice

“Hag.” It rhymes with “fag.”
And the word “Booze” sounds like “schmooze”
That is our whole life.

We love you, Pats. Stoli Bolli?


Patsy said...

These sweet words alone
just can't make up for the fact
I have a black eye

bigmouth said...

We're sorry, we thought you were looking at us when we threw it!

Patsy said...

Obviously I was not. This is why the gays should not be allowed to throw things!

Gunn said...

Was this Patsy also originally a man?