Thursday, June 29, 2006

A Man Can Tell A Thousand Lies, I've Learned My Lesson Well

We are very excited today because we are going to see Madonna in concert. And even though it’s against gay rules to wear shorts to an indoor concert, we brought a pair because bitch turns off the AC and when we saw her last summer we were wicked hot.

Anyway, last night we were out at Phoenix with an old friend who we discovered used to work in the White House for Karl Rove, under the direct orders of Ken Mehlman. He was involved in “Minority Outreach,” because as half Latino, he was the closest thing to a person or color they could find who was willing to work within 50 feet of Rove, or as we like to call him, Krang.

Anyway, he told us that many of the workers under Rove, who carefully constructed the Republican voter outreach machine that steamrolled the Democrats last election season, are gay. Even very senior people. The prevailing attitude was: “We don’t talk about being gay in the office, but it’s okay for us to be fags because we’re low key about it and we’re not like the queers you see on TV.” That was tempered with the vague promise: “We’ll change the party from the inside!”

It’s funny, there used to be a term for a person like that: Uncle Tom. We know that’s incredibly offensive, but so is the idea that there are gay people willing to work for a homophobe like Rove who sweatily stamps on our rights.

It’s time for a new term for these guys – like the gay Republicans who are going to actually listen to Arnold Schwarzenegger as he patronizes them tonight.

How about Uncle Cohn?

1 comment:

DorianDavis said...

"Uncle Cohn."

I haven't heard that little euphemism before.