So we had a long talk with porn star/director Michael Lucas yesterday about his new star, Clay Aiken-outer John Paulus. We also talked to Paulus. The whole story has begun to make us sad, so we won’t dwell on it.
But within an hour of when we talked, a messenger arrived at our office with a basket full of five of Lucas’s porn DVDs, three giant bottles of lube, some naked trading cards and some bath salts. After being ridiculed by my co-workers, bosses, and boss’s bosses, we stuffed the porn, lube, and salts in our bag.
As we headed out of the office, we were handed a few pairs of women’s panties, because we were going to a Tom Jones concert, and when in Rome, one throws panties at Tom Jones.
So after chugging a bottle of Bacardi Razz in the cab with a co-worker, we skipped to the gate of the concert where, yes, you guessed it, our bag was searched by an enormous stern black man. Out came porn, lube, and women’s panties. We were horrified.
Brother didn’t even bat an eye.
This is why we love New York.