Thursday, February 01, 2007

WHY YOU ARE GAY: Trapper Keepers

Quite frankly, what WASN’T gay about Trapper Keepers? They organized your life. They were colorful and whimsical. They were a lighter load than traditional binders, and they were always slick. And they had VELCRO.

When you were little, didn’t you love your Trapper Keepers just a little bit more than most of the boys? Didn’t you get a prim satisfaction from sliding the plastic rings perfectly back together? Didn’t you love the efficient organization of it all? Your papers didn’t fall out of the folders! This was clearly puckered lip of modernity.

After Trapper Keepers, how could you go back to being sloppy? How could you go back to boring, primary colors?

Damn you, Mead©. You made us gay.

6 comments:

MattGaymon said...

Not just any Trapper Keepers - Lisa Frank Trapper Keepers.

PS Are you taking nominations for this feature? I'd like to throw out Skip-Its and Sit-n-Spins.

eeco said...

or those Pogo-balls!

Aatom said...

I love this series of posts, they have a subversive gender theory prank feel. Unfortunately, I got stuck playing with little plastic soldiers (they looked so pretty when I lit them on fire in the wood stove) and miniature cars, so I was never able to exercise my inner fashion stylist on a Barbie like I so desperately wanted to. But as far as Trapper Keepers, couldn't you just as safely say "the 80's made me gay?"

MyMyMichl said...

Aatom--how could the 80's have made you gay? No one with a face as pretty as yours could possibly have been born any other way.

Toby said...

In middle school, a bully sliced my Trapper with a box cutter. It was traumatizing.

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