We have just made an amazing discovery.Nowhere Bar, the strange, always empty gay hole-in-the-wall near our apartment, has a special night every Wednesday. It's called Runt Nite. And it's for - wait for it - short gays.
And the appropriately-sized gays who love them.
This news really made our day. We can't stop imagining how every Wednesday, the Oompa Loompas of New York wriggle out of their trundle beds, get off the stepping stool in front of the bathroom sink, pull on their Gap Kids jeans and flock to Nowhere. There, they can drink .99 cent pints (har!), or half pints, which are cheaper (hardy har!), and attempt to grope one another under the barstools with their stubby Simpsonesque fingers. Brilliant.
If you're looking for us tonight, we'll be the ones walking down 14th Street with the bowling balls ...
4 comments:
haven't you heard that good things come in small packages?
What's wrong with big packages?
I find that where I live there are tons of short guys. It's the tall guys that are impossible to find. They are like unicorns or leprechauns...
JACK: What you have... is a pocket gay.
WILL: A pocket gay?
KAREN AND GRACE [BOTH]: A pocket gay?
JACK: A pocket gay. The perfect travel-size homosexual. Just pop him in a man-purse, a briefcase, and you're good to go. In ten years they'll be making 'em all that way.
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