We Suspect Charlize Theron Was Behind All Of This.

Well.

South Africa’s highest court has finally ruled that banning gay marriages is unconstitutional. This will pave the way for full homosexual marriage rights within a year, according to reports.

Yes, you read that correctly. SOUTH AFRICA. This is a country whose President, Thabo Mbeki, thinks that AIDS is caused by poverty and not by HIV. And they are ahead of us on the curve for equal rights.

The government hasn’t commented, but we’re suspicious that Mbeki will take this as a chance to look like a champion for civil rights. After all, only Spain, Canada, the Netherlands and Belgium (no, the last two are not the same country) allow gay marriage so far.

This is totally like the part in “Wicked” when Galinda gets to look good by helping the crippled girl, even though she was just being selfish.

We expect this situation to end similarly.