Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Yet Somehow We Were Happy That Jennifer Hudson Was Cast As Effie In Dreamgirls.

So we just saw the movie “Mrs. Henderson Presents,” starring the original fag hag, Dame Judi Dench. The rest of you proles will be able to see this movie next month. Now, we have our complaints and our compliments, but what’s worthy of note here is that the movie introduces Will Young in his debut role. If you’re a modern culture junkie, you’ll remember Will from when he won the first season of Britain’s “Pop Idol,” the precursor to our own “American Idol.” Young came out of the closet shortly after the win, and immediately went under an image re-vamp towards soft rock.

Quite frankly, he has a terrible-sounding voice and an audible lisp. And he can't act. Yet someone thought fit to place him opposite Dench and Bob Hoskins in this World War II tragicomedy. Imagine, if you will, if Clay Aiken was cast in a Civil War piece opposite Meryl Streep and Anthony Hopkins, and you’ll get an idea of what a travesty this is.

There is a lot of nudity in this film, both male and female (we see Hoskin’s ying but thankfully not Dench’s yang), and that includes Young. Unfortunately, in the one scene where everyone goes full frontal, Young is turned away from the camera, denying us the only possible pleasure that could be derived from his appearance in this film.

Come on, Will! Even Jude Law flashed us in Talented Mr. Ripley, and he has a tiny penis!

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