Fishwatch, Aren't You On Spring Break? Can't You Post? We're Too Busy Cowering In Terror From Flirty Straight Girls On The Strip.

So you know we're from Maine, right? No? Well, anyway, yeah - we grew up by a rocky beach outside of Portland. It was somehow both beautiful and plain at the same time. We loved everything that came along with it - but we didn't realize some things were missing. We went to only one Bar Mitzvah when we were thirteen, for example, and the two black kids in our entire public school were twins and only technically halfrican.

In our home state, stories like this are few and far between. Basically, a rich coastal heiress ADOPTED her lesbian girlfriend to ensure smooth inheritance and property sharing. Maine, despite having queer havens like Ogunquit and Portland, doesn't have advanced protection for gays on that front. Yet adults can adopt other adults.

The couple broke up, and then the heiress died, and now everything's up in the air. It's going to be a big case (we know this because it was one of the most emailed articles in the New York Times!) and both sides don't even seem to know what's going to happen.

We can't wait to hear how it turns out. Because the question of whether or not to adopt the men we have sex with has really been keeping us up at night.