This Is, After All, How Bush Got Elected

At last, an article in the New York Times that has it all: Gays! Politics! Cocaine! Canadians!

Wait, what?

Yes, it’s true. Canucks do drugs, and not just the ones that are cheaper than in the US. In fact, a potential leader of the Quebec separatist party admitted to doing cocaine AND being gay. And he’s handsome. And he went to Harvard! We’ve probably slept with him.

When André Boisclair’s cocaine use came to light, instead of torpedoing his campaign, it shot him ahead in the polls. We always knew the Quebecois were fruity ski bunnies, but this surprised even us.

But it does explain a lot about Celine Dion.